expectations come excellence

I actually told my supervisor that (the blog post title), because the more hope people show to me, the more I expect myself to perform, or I'll feel inferior, I'll feel that I lost a crucial mission. Perhaps this is where all the negativity in me originates. Sounds contradicting and ironic ey? Yeah, that is what makes me, me.

I used to argue back, word by word, whatever mum says. Nowadays I see an improvement in myself not to exchange words, but just let it be. Despise all the arguments at home; creates nothing but stress-related noises. And I know I shouldn't retaliate anyway.

For the first time in my young life, I felt as if I have torn my muscle. Just a typical stretch for the shuttle, but after that I felt a sharp nervy pain at the joint area between my torso and my right thigh. Ah, just another pain I thought. But I couldn't continue walking straight! Rest, rest is the word. But neh, not that bad. I don't feel pain for now at least. I'm someone who will refuse to sit still for long, so I wish it really is just another over-stretching. And my fast-healing recovery system will accomplish its job in no time. Hmm if it IS something serious, you'll find another long post up here. But for now, lets just hope we won't see any of that kind of post ;) Yes dad, I will remember to warm up adequately before games next time.

I was thinking while bathing (it always seems to be during this period), people who endure tough times are most likely the harder worker and the higher earner at the end of the day. The motivation, the cultivation, and eventually, the harvest is so satisfying. Formula? Simple. The only person that can motivate you, is yourself. Working at where I am now, helps me daily to remember that (whatever kind of) rewards come with plentiful of effort and deep-shit hard work. But once you have achieved success, your life will be filled with all the colours you can only dream of. Philosophy, it seems.