early phases of 2011

we used to all want to look and act cool in yf, be the standout or mr. popular, and be the spotlight of spotlights. perhaps its only natural that it doesn't twinge anymore just going about behind the scenes, coasting through and playing your own part in serving God, to try to bless the others who need it instead of yourself, and quietly making a difference.

the car had a major operation today, reviving all the subtle yet crucial tiny compartments i never knew of which have accumulatively damaged the car bits by bits gradually. not fully restored, but definitely a much needed operation no doubt. the owner shares the same bliss.

looking through the rings together makes me happy. it'll be a really meaning memorable gift for each other. (and no its not a hint, its a reality :p)

as the final few assignments are due next week, followed on by a massive wave of final exams DURING chinese new year - my last long semester and second last semester of uni like forever, it will be interesting to see how i sustain my momentum and my endurance throughout the whole period. after all that torment, it'll finally be time for a holiday. a honeymoon, in fact.

28 days ♥

Joy Williams - God Only Knows

has recently become one of my favourite Christian songs. Meaningful impactful song lyrics are so rare nowadays. We today have G6s and Keshas and Perrys..

Here is, to me, a song.

You're in one of those seasons

Everything seems to go so wrong

Wish I could give you a reason

But even I'm barely holding on

When it's hard to find the answers
Let this be your hope

God only knows all your broken pieces
Only He knows what you're going through
God only knows what you hide inside
And He's holding onto you
God only knows

You've had your fill of questions
There's so much that you need to know
But I don't blame you for asking
But it's time to let go of control

And I'm sorry for what you're feeling
Please hold on to this hope

Come on, come on, He knows your pain
Come on, come on, hold onto faith
Come on, come on, you're on your way
My friend, your struggle has an ending day

Only He knows
Only He knows
Only He knows

It's month 22, and we're approaching anniv2,

and melb :)

a pure disaster

Every tale starts off well,

things look damn good,

and the future reflects a smile.

Some are rather short-lived,

the rest never ever good,

perhaps in the very first place.

Usually it begins with ambition,

and ambition comes determination,

then egoism steps in,

and a little too much insistence,

and the downfall begins.

Look at the mess you have caused,

right from the little things,

up to the big bad happenings,

you have wronged at everything.

When it didn't seem right,

you pushed ahead might,

when it seems crashing down,

you believed it won't drown.

Right till this very day,

nothing ever looked right,

but it is all a little too late,

and there is nothing you can do.

They have finally left,

it would have been a feast,

but now they are pissed,

little we know what's underneath.

Why do you make people,

make people carry your bags,

where lives and futures lie,

and now nothing but bye.

Often times I would have pity,

but equal times I am angry,

for broken promises recycle,

time and time again.

I wish you know her life,

where thorns and wry,

never seem to die,

but she never want to sigh.

If you could turn back,

and see all you have achieved,

and see the remaining pieces,

lying around half dead,

and at least wish,

that you had never made,

so many of the wishes,

you once confidently make.

If only the time machine existed,

to realize what you have done,

to never put all these things,

right ahead of all others.

But the present can only wish,

for the past won't repeat,

now look towards the final dish,

where no mercies meet.

All that past week or two's work out down the drain, and the terrible past few days... I definitely don't hope these that are indications of my year 2011. Or could it be?

Nevertheless,

happy new year 2011.